


Coming Up Next

by bluecinderella4



Series: How I Met Your SHIELD [5]
Category: Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. (TV)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-10-31
Updated: 2015-10-31
Packaged: 2018-04-29 01:59:01
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,464
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5112143
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bluecinderella4/pseuds/bluecinderella4
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Fitz is already nervous about an upcoming evaluation and the result of Hunter's dinner gesture doesn't make things any better. Plot altered from the 'How I Met Your Mother' episode "Challenge Accepted"</p>
            </blockquote>





	Coming Up Next

"Good morning team," Coulson seemed chipper than usual this particular morning.

"This can't be good," surprisingly, Mack was the one to vocally observe this.

"Who can tell me what happens the last week of September?"

"It ends and becomes October?" Daisy actually guessed.

"Okay, who remembers what happened during last year's last week of September?" No response. "Seriously?"

"What are you getting at AC?"

"Annual employee evaluations."

"You mean that thing we did last year where you treated us like we were in school and graded us?"

"Where I evaluated you, yes."

"Bloody hell that's going to be an annual thing?" Hunter bemoaned.

"I don't like this any more than you do."

"You're the director, can't you not do it."

"Not unless you don't want additional funding." No one said anything after that. "Your one on one assessment schedules will be posted outside my office later today. Don't forget that attendance is mandatory."

Daisy folded her arms across her chest. "How is this  _not_  like school?"

"It's probably not a good idea to whine about this," Coulson was about to leave, "it might not look good on your evaluations."

"Sorry  _Principal_  Coulson."

…

"I for one am not worried," Simmons seemed confident in this.

"Of course you're not worried, you're perfect," Daisy griped.

"I am not perfect. I may appear so because I accept my flaws and mistakes and I do not mind another person reminding me of them because it's merely constructive criticism, which of course helps us for future endeavors."

"I'm just glad I'm not going first," Mack took a swig from his beer can. "Turbo's lucky; he gets to go last."

"What's so great about that?" Fitz asked him. "Waitin' is the worst. I'm gonna be so anxious I'll come up with dozens of 'here's what can go wrong' scenarios and that just exacerbates my fear of somethin' awful happenin' during the talk with Coulson. I won't be able to eat, I won't be able to sleep, I won't be able to focus on anythin' but the impending doom of the evaluation! I just know he's gonna bring up my mum's death and how badly it affected my work."

"Are you serious?" Hunter took a drink of his beer before continuing. "Having a parent die might actually get you sympathy from the boss. If anyone has anything to worry about, it's me." Everyone chorused their agreement over that. "C'mon people, show a guy some support!"

Bobbi entered the kitchen carrying bags of takeout. "Dinner's on me, tonight."

"What's the occasion?"

"No occasion; we decided to alternate on group dinners and it was my turn to pay. Which means-"

"Next round of dinner is on me."

Bobbi kissed his cheek. "Good boy." She thrusted a bag at him. "I got a surprise for you."

"Are we talking gift surprise or sex surprise?" The group expressed their disgust at him. "What?"

"Definitely not the latter."

"Former then," Hunter excitedly got his food. "Hey, Bob" his excitement soon became displeasure, "what the hell is this?"

"That, Hunter, is called a salad."

"This has got to be the wrong bag. Who's got my order of hot wings?"

"I took the liberty of ordering that for you. You are going to start eating healthy again."

"Do you want to kill me?"

"You have been putting on a little weight," Mack noted.

"Oi, Mack, does this involve you?"

"He's right," Bobbi agreed. "You have been eating whatever you want and the effects are showing. You're putting on weight, you're acting sluggish and tired, you're spending more time on the toilet, and I'm finding crumbs in places where I shouldn't find crumbs. From now on, you are going to start eating healthy."

Hunter groaned. "If I knew you were going to start acting like this, I would've married you again."

Daisy reached for her meal. "You say that like it's a bad thing."

"In our case, it is," Bobbi explained to her. "Being married to each other was the worst."

"Complete disaster," Hunter added.

"So don't expect any wedding bells for us in the future. We're better off staying the way we are now. Besides, one married couple is enough." When she glanced over at FitzSimmons, she found them both scarfing down hot wings. This of course got everyone else to stare at the couple, which then made FitzSimmons awkwardly look around at everyone else. "See, they can't not do everything together."

…

Everyone was surprised by Hunter loudly whistling throughout the playground before the week was officially over. "Chow's on, come get it!"

Curious, everyone went into the kitchen. Mack was the first to notice the carryout bags. "Oh my God, Hunter actually paid for a meal."

"Guessed who passed his evaluation?"

"Mack," everyone besides Hunter and Mack answered.

Hunter groaned. "Okay, yes, but I was referring to myself."

"Surprise, surprise, Hunter was talking about himself," Daisy rolled her eyes. "Okay Hunter, what's for dinner?"

"Tonight's meals come courtesy of  _Blue Bowl Restaurant_."

Bobbi paused to think. "Why does that place sound so familiar?"

"Because it's my go-to restaurant when I want to save money. You remember their soups?"

"Apparently not."

"Well you will." He took a collection of soups out of the bags. "And it's an equally healthy alternative to that nasty salad."

"There's no proof to that last statement."

"Well I certainly prefer soups to salads."

"I just can't believe he actually passed his evaluation," Mack commented.

"I have achieved some great strides in my specialist field, thank you very much. And after dinner, I'm gonna show off my achievements in charades. Rematch: Team Hunter vs. Team Mack."

"Oh, you're on."

Following dinner, it was an intense game of charades between Team Hunter (Hunter, Simmons, and Daisy) and Team Mack (Mack, Fitz, and Bobbi).

"Okay Simmons, you're up," Daisy nudged Simmons toward the center of the lounge.

"Here's hoping for something easier than the last one," she reached into the hat for her word. "Well this one might not be so bad," she put the strip of paper in her pocket and began charading for her team.

"Movie…" Daisy understood Simmons as well as Fitz, "…four words...second word…one? First?" Simmons nodded. "First! Uh… _The First Wives Club!_ "

"YES!"

A dumbfounded Hunter sat there as the enthusiastic Daisy bounded up and ran over to Simmons. The two of them bounced up and down until Simmons suddenly clutched her stomach. "Simmons?"

"Jemma," Fitz couldn't help but worry as he went over to his. "Jem, you alright?"

That question was determined to be a 'no' as Simmons retched all over Fitz, the contents of her dinner splattered all over his shirt. "I have to go," she ran toward the bathroom.

A strange rumble sound came from the couch Mack and Bobbi were sitting at. Everyone turned to see an achy looking Bobbi holding onto her stomach. "I just remembered why that place was so familiar." She slowly stood up. "Every time we ate there we got food poisoning," Bobbi then hurried toward an available bathroom.

Mack got up off his seat and stood in front of Hunter. "Hunter, is that true?"

"Is that why the food's so cheap?" Daisy felt the need to ask.

Hunter held up a finger. "The answer to both of those questions is 'yes'."

Mack glared at Hunter. "You better hope it doesn't happen to me or 'yes' is also going to be an answer to 'am I gonna kick the crap out of you'."

"To be fair, there's a very good chance the crap will already be out of me."

"Then I'll have to settle for slapping you."

A gurgling sound emitted from Daisy's stomach. "Put me down for a slap too."

…

Ever the gentleman, Fitz fetched a clean bucket from the storage room for his wife at three in the morning (having already been up all night as she battled the dreaded food poisoning). "Got the last one," he passed her the bucket.

"Thank you," she brought the bucket closer to her face as Fitz held her hair back, "Thank you again."

"I think it's caught up to everyone who ate Hunter's dinner. Mack and I have yet to have it, but now Mack's got it. This means I'm next. I can see into the future Jemma," Simmons made an unholy sound and retched into the bucket, "and it's not pretty." Fitz did some calculations. "It seemed to hit you the quickest, followed immediately by Bobbi, Daisy soon after, then Hunter, and now Mack. Why am I last?" A sudden realization dawned on Fitz. "The evaluations!"

"What?"

"I was last for the evaluations! Mine's at eight o'clock this mornin'. This hit you around nine at night and you're still ill so it's safe to assume this lasts for at least five hours. This gives me yet another worst case scenario for my evaluation that is now most likely gonna happen. I can see me sittin' in Coulson's office spewing nasty bile out of one or both ends of my body."

"That's a charming visual," she sarcastically grumbled before vomiting.

"As is that," Fitz tried not to show his disgust.

"Oh God," Simmons ran into the bathroom.

Fitz sighed. "Prob'ly should go swipe some cleanin' supplies."

…

Coulson was tossing a small, rubber Captain America ball in the air when the knock at the door distracted him enough to miss his catch and cringe as the ball hit something on his desk. "Just a sec!" He quickly cleaned his mess, hid the ball, and put on a businessman demeanor. "Come in." Fitz slowly opened the door. "Ah Fitz, you're looking well."

"Not for long," Fitz muttered under his breath.

"What was that?"

"Nothing," Fitz took the open seat across from Coulson. "Can we just get this over with?"

Coulson shot him a skeptical look. "Sure," he reached for Fitz's file. "Well I want to start off by complimenting you on your teamwork skills. It's no surprise you work well with Simmons, you always have, but you've also made some amazing things with Mack, and even impressed countless of people with improvement of your field work."

"Thank you, Sir."

"On that note: you need to sort out priorities. In the past few years your work has been affected by rescuing Simmons from the monolith, then going back to rescue Will Daniels, and of course helping him adjust to modern day society."

"It was the right thing to do."

"And that's why I have the utmost respect for you. You always do the right thing even if none of us think it is. When we heard about Simmons' space boyfriend, none of us wanted to go back for him, but you did."

"I felt I owed him that. He kept Jemma safe, brought her a bit of happiness."

"I thought you might like to know he's doing well. I know you two haven't seen him since he was a witness at your elopement…I wanna say two years ago last June?" Fitz nodded. "I had my doubts hiring him on as SHIELD, but he certainly has proven himself. He's also found love. You should take pride in knowing that you made it possible for him to have a life here where he can be happy." Fitz shrugged. "But there have also been other things to take away your focus. I can understand the death of your mother being one of them, but you and Simmons trying for a baby had more of an effect."

"With all due respect, Sir, that's not your concern. If my wife and I want a family, we'll have a family."

"I'm not condemning it. I actually approve of it…as does former Director Fury."

"Well Jemma and I haven't actually tried in months though, so you'll notice that's brought an increase in my work productivity."

Coulson nodded. "I just want you to know that you and Simmons do have the okay to start a family."

"Thank you."

"And honestly, I have nothing of significance to add. You're doing a fantastic job. You're not the same young man who started here years ago and I'm proud of the man you've become. Your mother is also extremely proud of you as well."

"How do you-"

Coulson passed him a letter. "She wrote me this a few weeks before she died. Apparently your mother thought I had a big hand in molding you into who you are today and she wanted to thank me for that. I wrote her back saying it's all him; I had no part in that." Fitz tried not to tear up as he read what his mother had said. "You can keep that by the way."

Fitz neatly folded the letter and put it in his shirt pocket. "Thank you, Sir."

"One more thing before you go: what the hell is going on around here? The bathrooms are in use, the storage room has been cleared of buckets, and this place smells like a gas station men's bathroom."

"Yeah, you can blame Hunter for that."

"Oh God, not that cheap restaurant again. Tell me you didn't eat that food."

"I did."

"But you're not emitting disgusting contents from either end of your body?"

"Not yet, anyway."

"I suppose Simmons-"

"Yeah."

"You should probably go take care of her."

"Prob'ly."

"Oh," Coulson handed Fitz a lanyard, "I wanted to give these out myself."

Fitz blinked. "Am I-"

"Welcome to Level Seven."

…

Fitz seemed to be in a daze as he went back to his room. Simmons was sitting on the bed waiting for him when he got back. "Fitz?"

Fitz brought himself back to reality. The first thing he noticed was a cleaned up Simmons. "Hey, you're lookin' better! Did you take a shower? You were in that bathroom long enough." Simmons responded to him by getting off the bed and pressing her lips to his. "Jem, I'm flattered, but was that really necessary?"

"More than necessary," she reached for something under her pillow and presented it to Fitz.

Fitz's mouth hung open as he tried to form words. "Is that…" he continued to point to the pregnancy test in her hand.

Correction, the  _positive_  pregnancy test she held in her hand. "I guess it does happen when you stop trying." Fitz blew out a few excited breaths. "We're going to have a baby." The ecstatic grin on Fitz's face soon faltered as he pressed his palm to his stomach. "Fitz?"

"Jem, this is wonderful, I'm really, really happy, and I love you so much; but please know that what I'm about to do in that bathroom I do out of joy," with that, he raced into the bathroom closing the door behind him.

A small laugh escaped Simmons. "And here I thought I was supposed to have morning sickness."

**Author's Note:**

> I did plan on this being the last one in the series. However, if anyone would like to leave requests based on other episodes I'd be more than happy to consider them.


End file.
